Work: Hot mess as usual. It has gotten to the point where I have started applying elsewhere. I really wish it didn't come to this point but I don't know how much longer I can deal with the complete dysfunction. It may be the same elsewhere but I feel like anywhere has to be better. I'm good enough to fill in, I'm good enough to train other people but I'm not good enough??? Why do I give up so much for nothing in return?
Skating:things seem to be ok. Hopefully I will get my act together for Nationals this year.
Other: since I can never seem to get weekends anymore might as well throw the extra money at the loan? Exercise seems to be part of the routine so at least there's that.
Ballroom: since the last time I actually competed!!! It was fantastic!!! I think I watched the video every night for like a week....if I could dance every day I would...it's the only place where I don't have to rely on doing every thing myself.I have learned how to put my full faith and trust in someone else and everything turned out ok...more than ok..fantastic!! 7 1st place ribbons and 1 2nd place. Honestly I get so much more out of it than just dancing. It opens me up to a whole world of feelings and emotions. Starting to think that there will not be anything between us but i can't help feeling the way i do....oh life why must you taunt me so??
