It has been a whirlwind the past few weeks. We've survived both conventions and now the games really begin. It was really hard to be left behind, it must be what the athletes who come in 4th at the Olympic Trials feel like. You are so close to everything you ever could have dreamed of you can taste it. You know exactly what will happen and when it will happen, you know the dedication and passion that brought you oh so close yet so far. Everything in you is screaming, I should be there, why am I not there?
I know it is not my time quite yet and I simply have to be patient and wait my turn. But I don't want to, I want it to be now. It is hard to hear other people talk about how unhappy they seem to be, when on the inside I am screaming, I will do it! You have no clue how good you have it. You have no clue what it feels like to think nobody wants you, to think that maybe this wasn't a good idea. I am in a town of type A personalities just like me and we all want more we all are driven and successful. They have no clue what I had to do to get to where I am now. But now that I'm here I want more, go big or go home.
I went to a skating show over the weekend. It was wonderful! My first time back at the rink in about a month. It showed me the joy and passion out there. This is the one place where I have no worries, no responsibilities, nothing getting in my way. To meet an icon of the sport like I did was absolutely unreal!
And to see the simplest of movements glide across the ice so powerfully, it reminded me why I fell in love with this crazy sport in the first place. The simple glide, the rip of the blade, the feeling of flying, the wind across my face, there is nothing better. Just give me a piece of the ice and I am in my own world and very happy. Sure I would love more, but you know what? I work with what I have and that is okay.
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